What a enormous week!

It was quite a enormous week that was!

Glad that the sun is finally shining after all the heavy monsoon rain and the great flooding. I've been trying to keep myself busy with a more productive things in ghost writing. Pretty much, it has been my life. Good grief.

Nothing much to say lately aside from I'm still blessed to be here everyday. This life has always its ups and downs so deal with it. Sounds like my favorite mantra nowadays.

Gotta keep going.

What if time machines really do exist.

Pretty much my life is a myriad of routines of waking up and staying up and mostly keeping my mind set on track whenever these little earthquakes tried to steal away my composure. Every day has always been a struggle I guess ever since I was born.

There are times my inner self painstakingly cried so hard to what life has to offer for me. As much as I tried to be the best person that I could ever be it always falls down that my best wasn't good enough for anyone.

I never hunger for attention nor sympathy or any admiration that somehow for some people I define bravery and that I never say die. I guess, my best wasn't good enough to make it this far or maybe just maybe I keep on living through Divine intervention that I'm still here. Good grief!

When I was young I really thought time machines really do exist. Its like how they do in the movies people time travel and one snap they can go places where they had never been. No sore feet. No hassle. And one blink of an eye everything is different. We are not who we supposed to be kind of episodes.

Then, Mom and Dad won't grew apart.
I will not be a by a product of a broken family.
I can go places I've never been.
Go bungee jumping.
Ride a hot air balloon.
Build my own house full of laughter and smiles.
Create a shelter for neglected cats and dogs.
Wear dresses and heels.
Love like you'll never get hurt.
Etc. etc.

Wow, there's just so many things coming out into my so-called bleak mind. I can't stop giggling like a lost little girl. I can almost picture myself doing all those things though I know I might not be the person I am now today writing this. Though anything is possible with the power of words, persistent, verbs, adjectives and little dash of imagination as if it could really happen.

That is if only time machines really do exist.

A blessing and a curse.

Voila!

You might find me at the most unconventional circumstances this time of the year. I'm really trying to keep my track in my composure as much as possible in whatever life and people has going to throw on me. I've always been that way ever since. I realize how everyone has been so moved  on and having a of life their own. Good for them anyway. I guess, life is what it is. Sometimes, the things we cared so much and longed for and worked hard for can be so harder to reach. Likewise about people you just can't rely on them as they also has a life of their own. That's a freaking reality. Such is life. And that is how freaking my life lately.

Though I've always had a hundred reasons to be thankful most especially when a pretty rough day has passed. I know I'm on another phase again on re-examining and searching through myself how far can I go on in this life. I've always know ever since a kid how much this disability can be a blessing and a curse. I bet you. I got the best and the worst of both worlds. And I very much know the limitation that it will brought me as I go on with my life as an adult and the coming years. I am no longer a teenager either an eighteen year old who is still in the shadows my own fears and rejection of others. I am now in my mid-twenties who supposed to know that this is exactly what I really wanted to do. In my case, its always been different because I tend to live my life on a purpose not for the sake of pleasing the wants, wishes and desires of other people.

I'm trying to live for myself. Yes, you have to learn to love yourself above anyone else before you can show love to others in return. I must say, it is never been truer in any lifetime.

But at the end of the day no matter how hard the curse I tried to hold on to the notion that this disability is a blessing in a more bigger picture.

xoxo

Never been anywhere

I'm trying to rekindle the moment where blogging is the surest thing to me. I guess, I've been out of the loop lately to write how quirky the day was like for me or simply it just came by unnoticed. I don't know. So there you go a little bump in the road right there.

Though all I know is that where ever I look everything changes and that's a fact. It just sucks how these feeling continue to devour me after so many years like any normal human being. It's not that I hate my life right now the thought that I could've done better still lingers at the back of head right now. At the end of the day, it only boils down how much you are willing to hope against hope thinking you did your best that you can do.

After almost 5 years of blogging and sharing all my thoughts into this platform, I'm still going no where. Still kept on sitting, waiting, wishing...

Words for Keeps

Nothing is much truer than these words.

"Keep your eyes simple. Keep your eyes on the prize. Keep the fine fight of faith."

Old HS Passage

I found these words written in my high school notebook back then sort of more like a random quotation... that just describes what I'm feeling lately. Just so beautiful...

Each of us has the right and responsibility to assess the roads which lies ahead, and those over which we have traveled. 


And if the future road looms ominous or unpromising and the roads back uninviting then, we need to gather over resolve and carrying only the necessary baggage step off that road into another direction.


The only limits are, as always, those of vision. No matter how full the river is, it still wants to grow.


xoxo

I hate you PMS!

So, is this how it feels to be a girl? Lately, it's this PMs thing that no one can ever understands. Human nature for sure that is. I guess, I'm just sick and tired of being sick and tired pretty much it goes more like that around today.

But that doesn't mean it's an enough reason for to leave some writing on pending. Glad I'd have some biscuit crackers and a cup of coffee to count on.

Okay, enough of too much bawling of tears.

Praying for a more blessed week ahead.

xoxo

Marching March Madness

Here you go Marching March Madness.

I say madness because summer has officially started here in the tropics. It's been a scorching hotness about 32 C is the warmest average daily temperature somehow too much heat really sucks. Just imagine that happened everyday. My head is just a little too dizzy from a sudden nap this afternoon which I totally regretted by the way.

I swear to myself it won't happened again. Now my body clock has gone back to its usual staying late night hours for working some stuff online at the same time playing around the social media stuff. So, that makes me so pumped up and trying to forget all the dramas and chaos of the daily life. Pretty much the day has gone by like the day it was yesterday.

Basically, that's the picture. I'm glad there's Mom, the cats and the dogs to stand by my side whatever goes through me at the end of the day.

Yes, I've been good at multitasking lately.

Feels like it was one of those days when you can't get over yourself a task and starting out other task again at the same time.

To me it was pouring all your energy into something that can be worthwhile for you in the end and sometimes it doesn't matter. It is more like hoping against hope that everyday is a new day. You can always get a new start to whatever you haven't done finishing the other day.

Carpe diem or simply known as the art of seizing the day.

Now I'm pretty much stuck with some fun art to do on Zazzle, writing a few lenses on Squidoo as well as catching up a new favorite TV show series and a Meryll Streep movie marathon today. She's a such versatile actress.

I'm thinking of writing some movie reviews next time. I forgot about that.

Well, it is never too late.

Here's to the heat of the summer days!

xoxo