Thursday, February 3, 2011

When age is a dreadfully dreaded number

The trouble in listening to sappy love songs is that it makes you teary eyed, runny nose, and it can almost breaks you down all of a sudden with or without a definite reason into a series of emotional uphill climb.

Thanks to Steven Curtis Chapman’s I will be here then a quick switch to head banging sound of Kings of Leon – that is pretty much on my random boring playlist lately. I won’t mind. Good times.

Now the dreadfully dreaded day is here. I know, age is just a number.Well, it's a little too early anyways I rather post it or I may end up procrastinating later on. It’s not like a mid-quarter life crisis but you know the feeling when you reached that certain age you start to wonder and question yourself. What’s going on? Am I living it right? It’s just okay when you are just eighteen don’t worry I still live with my parents and you still have one year to go before you’re on your twenties. Then when you are on your twenties you have to endure the frustrations of finishing school and finding work and all other jazz.

As for me it’s a different case. It’s a life in between the trivial and the road less traveled by many.

If you haven’t realized I’ve been insane a very long time ago. I just manage to win back my composure after being hit by a couple of surgeries and anesthesia and pain relievers and maybe a couple of divine interventions.

Please give the credit to a lot of amazing people in my life online and offline who fought and brave all the storms of life with me when I felt like I’m almost in the verge of giving up.

Time flies swiftly when you seem too much busy with life even if it feels like nothing is going on presumably after the day and the other. I guess, I sort of get used to the bubble for quite a long time now for me to get adjusted to the everyday routine after a couple of years of health-issues, online work and house musings simultaneously sometimes things kind of messed up. Pretty much it becomes part of my system which I never taken so seriously just like being in a room full of people you have even barely know. Every day feels like a brand new day and it is. Never withhold the enthusiasm of the kid in you from being curiously delighted in everyday life.


Of course, don’t take yourself often too seriously. Yes, I'm guilty because I always taken things so seriously.

Don’t get me wrong but I’m enjoying all the craziness somehow with a bit tad of dramas and exaggerations in a written word compare it halfway in real life.

It’s never too late to be grateful for who you are and what you ought to be and most especially to those people who never get tired believing in your potentials as a person as well those who don’t appreciate and believe. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter what they’re thinking it doesn’t define you as a person anyway so better be good and cultivate your ideals and even accept the simplest and the least way that you can do.

And when everything becomes a blur, I’m opt to have some breather for awhile and in any case I just sleep or curl up myself with a good book or else you’ll find me end up watching MasterChef or pet my cat in any time of the day.

(If you are allergic to cats or dogs we cannot get along. Pretty much it’s chaotic inside the house but fun and it is what makes it homey.)

There it boils to one thing I’m pretty normal now I guess doing some reality check right there.

Though I admit it’s painful to read the past entries and I rather not wrote anything too personal but it is some sort of an aid to the road of healing. It’s not that I committed anything disgraceful in my life but this is me and this is what reality bites when you stricken with a disease and you can’t find your way out to be heard that can almost weaken all your ability you have no resort but to trust your guts and your intuition that eventually things will matter in the end.

Hang in there, Linchpins (as the famous Seth Godin puts it).